the best you can hope for is an appreciation for the extent of what may be ahead.
But you leave that set firmly in the future.
The present is what matters.
Besides family, for now you have others in your life; some close, some not so close.
That constantly changes.
People enter and exit. Some go with hardly a trace, some leave scars.
Others never leave, bringing at times the chaotic mix of gifts and expectations we refer to as friendship.
Who’s to say when the journey begins?
You fall in-step; walking together,
perhaps not even always aware of the presence of the other.
The realization: you look at one another and see you’ve become traveling companions.
Things have been shared and through it all you’ve grown closer together than you may have dreamed possible.
An acknowledgement; a shared understanding. Few words are needed, if any.
Decisions, changing directions, accommodations:
the things new couples must become accustomed to…
…mostly acknowledgement that you are no longer two individuals.
The way ahead becomes clearer:
you realize that this is the path both of you need to be following.
So many go through life searching for the one, true thing.
Some find it; not all.
Many miss it for it rarely exists as-is.
The truth: it is not so much a process of discovery as it is one of becoming.
“We can do this,” is the spark,
but the follow-through is not easy.
Trust, perseverance and, yes, modesty become essential, well-used tools.
Little souls join with yours.
Patience and finances are tested to–even beyond—the limits.
Once again you change; adapt, even grow.
Day by day those new lives come into their own
until you realize that ‘me’ has long since departed the centre. It’s now ‘us.’
The time, so long but so short; a blur.
The finer details become increasingly elusive but the broad strokes…so bold.
Yes, it is the ‘big picture’ that seems to scaffold the thoughts.
But the details: where did they all go?
Ah, yes, the photo albums, the videos; one memory after another.
The “little” ones become not as much so.
Their lives are increasingly their own centres,
not simply a part of ours.
And there’s no diminution of work; always commitments.
But sometimes now you do find yourself alone. Those times; so foreign; unwelcome. Where is she? Is she coming back soon? Then real life can resume.
And now, the present, by the numbers:
By one measure it’s around 45 years, since we met.
By another it’s around 33, since we first dated.
By this one measure, though, there are no ‘abouts.’
Its twenty five years since we were married.
So much has happened since that day, so long ago, when we made it official.
What a wonderful journey it has been!
Here’s to 25 more.