Back in the day my father had a hand cranked phonograph
and in my boyish youth I enjoyed putting on it my 33s.
At 78 the chipmunked sounds would make me laugh
and best of all boring talk would slip by, just like the breeze.
But now up in Ottawa Mr. Harper and his gang of cons have instead
judged it wise to make the election campaign to last a full 78 drawn-out days
and just as they’ve managed to turn just the best of Canada on its head
78 now means the opposite—no more fun just heaps and heaps of bored malaise.
Ideally a lengthy campaign should the others, their chances impair.
So for the past 11 weeks, from the attack ads there’s been no reprieve:
“Justin just isn’t ready,” and the others “in it for themselves May and Mulcair.”
We need to be saved from terrorists and niqabs so we should vote for Steve.
And so now after watching the mud and crap being slung for all of 78 days
here we are, election day, at least for those of us who left it to the end.
I’ll try and bring my gang of six to the poll, head home to watch the Jays,
and hope that quite a few, away from Ottawa, in exile, we will send.
If you haven’t already figured it out I didn’t need 78 days to decide
and in fact, with each passing day, with Harper I become more pissed.
Still I will admit the choice was difficult; not an easy ride
to choose between the names that will be on my ballot list.
But which party to vote for? A question not that easy for to address
even when I take out what’s-his-name who’s running for the cons
I’m still left with some good choices, making it hard for me to assess
who I’d like to see representing us here in Mount Pearl South – St. Johns.
The Cons? The guy—Harper—who won last time through feats of sleight?
Says frig climate change, and we don’t need to hear scientists and women’s voices;
who opposes the notion of water as a human right;
wants to kill off Medicare, international aid, the census, and reduce our choices.
The guy who insists it’s HIS government, not ours, just wants more power, less oversight;
and while insisting only he knows the economy gave us nothing but deficit;
killed the Kelowna accord and dashed the dreams of our aboriginals outright.
It’s clear he cares only about the super-rich and as for the rest of us he doesn’t give a shit.
Liberals? They insist they offer us real change
a break from years of going nowhere fast
so to start it out they plan a bunch of deficits—strange,
isn’t that just what the cons did for the six years that have just passed?
And while free votes and transparency strike me as very good
about remaking the democratic process in 18 months, I have my doubts.
Besides I don’t care about door to door mail so I wonder, like ya would,
once they get their majority Monday night, can they effectively toll this out?
Greens? I will admit that to me their platform makes good sense.
Cooperation, sustainability, climate action and building strong communities
are just the things I want government to dispense—
things the current crowd banjaxed, one by one, and with impunity.
But still when I look at the list of candidates I fail to be inspired
few of them are expected to put up much of a contest
save the leader—a person I admit I do admire,
so a vote for them counts for little more than a protest.
So which one will I vote for? No, that bit I won’t disclose
lest the one who gets in is not the one that I voted for
and I don’t need him to have that stuck up his nose
if I ever have to get something done and come upon his door.
Finally the 19th is here and I’ll dash off from work to make my x without delay,
head home glad the election’s over—thinking what a miserable slog it’s been
and while I’m watching baseball I’ll reminisce on the words I always say:
it doesn’t matter who you vote for ‘cause “The Government” always gets in.